Recently, I bumped into a colleague at a restaurant and greeted her by saying, ‘How are you?’ She responded with a sigh, ‘Too busy, under a lot of stress.’ Her answer jolted me as similar responses from various friends, acquaintances and colleagues, reverberated within my mind. This led me to think about the tremendous pressures of contemporary life and the challenging times that we live in.
Take, for example, a lunch break in school. A few years ago, a common greeting would be, ‘Have you eaten?’ ‘What’s special for lunch?’ This was a reflection of our value system, both care about food and a concern whether you have enough and would like to share. As we have catapulted into a post- Covid changed scenario, the common greeting has changed to, ’Are you busy?’ or ‘Are you free?’ This shift echoes in the corridors of our work, family and our social circles. And of course, the inevitable answer is, ‘Yes, thank you, I am very busy, too many Zoom calls.’ or ‘Yes, thank you, not free at all. A lot of stress.’
This transformed world has led us too often to measure our value system by how busy or how engaged we are. But are these true measures of how we are? I believe that the true measure of how we are is WHO WE ARE, the kind of meaning that we make of our lives.
This is something I wish to share with parents and friends alike.
Very recently I came across a word in Pali ‘Metta’, an ancient mind-training practice which translates as, ’friendliness to oneself and others.’ On further reading I found a similar word in Sanskrit, ‘Maitri’ meaning benevolence or loving- kindness. This is a popular form of meditation among the Buddhist followers. It is a flexible practice that can happen anytime, anywhere. There are no goals to reach or objectives to achieve. It is a way of enjoying positive moments of joy and appreciation of what life has to offer.
MAY I BE HAPPY
MAY I BE HEALTHY
MAY I BE SAFE.
Values are transformed from doing to believing. The busy, stressful life fades into the background and the inner life with happy people around takes over. Probably one can change the pronoun as one goes on to:
MAY YOU BE HAPPY
MAY YOU BE HEALTHY
MAY YOU BE SAFE.
There are numerous fears and trepidations in our world today. The unknown future, the technological challenges, the choices for our children that we are not aware of, the entire race for achievement and success. So many heavy-hearted, perplexed folks struggling to reach reasonable decisions. There is not much that any of us can do but love and share. I truly believe that ‘empathy is a heart-space large enough for all the uncertainties in the world’. Let us offer ‘Maitri- Metta’ a heart full of loving-kindness. Misquoting Portia’s speech about mercy in The Merchant of Venice- ‘Maitri is twice blessed; it blesses those who give and those who receive.’
